.....SO I BOUGHT NEW BED SHEETS

©CherieElainePhotography2020

People that I love are losing their chickens. 

The world is so angry. The outbursts are personal and violent and hateful and heartbreaking. And it is happening to MY people. 

So I bought new sheets. 

I haven't bought sheets for my bed for at least 20 years. I've been given sheets as a gift. I've had lovely hand-me-downs that have served me well. But to personally go into a department store and choose something soft and lovely for my personal use is something that I do very little of. 

This morning I realized that the simple act of putting new, soft, silky feeling sheets on my bed was a way of self-soothing, self-calming. It is a way of taking special care of myself. 

Special care so that I don't lose my chickens. 

I lived a long time as an angry, dissatisfied sort of woman, under the oppression of another's decisions concerning me. How I felt, who I was, who I was expected to be. It was how I was brought up and what I married into. 

For 20 years I've been struggling to free myself of that. I've avoided the confrontation that comes with being completely my own. I've shocked some people lately. I've offended more than a few. And I've altered my relationships probably permanently. 

So. Many. Tears. I could fill jars with them. 

But.....

I need to be true to myself. Especially now. As a Single, Female, Christian, American, it is time that I show myself the respect I expect from others, and be me. Love me. Take good care of me. 

It all starts with new bed sheets. Something soft to keep me soft. 

Love yourselves. I love you. 

C.