HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO MEND A BROKEN HEART?

There is a theory popular in many self-help books that says you cannot love another until you love yourself. 

Hmmm.....do you believe that? 

What if it's not about loving yourself, but letting others love you when you can't?

God, other people, significant others, pets....

Maybe there isn't any big answer but tiny clues that you are loved, and they are interrupted by anger, disappointment and depression. 

A morning not long ago, I was journaling and felt this Deep Presence say to me that all He wanted was my heart. My response came so quickly: 

But God, its broken into so many pieces.

©CherieElainePhotography2022

And it is. It has been glued back together over and over. And then it gets dropped and shattered again. Small, undetectable shards seem to disappear as I gather up the pieces again, leaving gaps invisible to the naked eye, but there all the same, leaking bits of myself to the ground. 

I have the appearance of being okay, and then days like today happen, days that make me want to bury my face in a pillow and cry loudly and disappear from the way I am expected to behave, and be sad for awhile. Just for today. And maybe tomorrow.

But.....I get up, brush my teeth and put something special on to make it feel like I am presentable (sometimes I am, and sometimes not so much). Today it is my favorite hoodie from my favorite bar in Denver called Bruz. Comfy, and cute. Some days it is my favorite hippy dress. Sometimes its just a pair of earrings. Just put on something special. 

SO. MANY. PIECES.

"You have already survived 100% of the worst days of your life."

I paraphrased this from a Norm Kelly quote, but isn't it so true? It might be today, but if you're reading this, you survived. It might be a year, months, a complete life of sorrow or even horror. But if you're reading this, you survived. 

Do you know why? Because a GOD much bigger than ourselves has already healed the heartbroken and bandaged their wounds. (Psalm 147:3) And " If your heart is broken, you’ll find God right there; if you’re kicked in the gut, he’ll help you catch your breath." (Psalm 34:18) And this promise, that "Heart-shattered lives....don't for a moment escape God's notice." (Psalm 51:17)

My heart is shattered, it aches, and feels so very fragile. But even when I believe I can't take another breath, somehow He fills my lungs. 

We can't search for something better. We can't search for something to fill the void that a broken heart leaves behind. All we can do is gather all of the broken pieces and wait. Just.....wait.....

Love you.

Cherie