Week One of 2017 is Done
The first week of the new year is over. Hmmm......
Have I done a single thing to start this year differently?
It has been a very strange start in 2017, but I can definitely say 2016 ended a whole lot better than it started.
I finally settled into a place to call home. Here I find rich conversation, friendship and purpose. I have a roommate that not only understands me, but lives in a similar mental space. She is by far, one of the most intelligent, beautiful and progressive women I know. She challenges my mind. It it delightful and it is really good to know I am not crazy, or at least not alone if I am. :-)
I've been wondering if I have writers block or if my brain is weary and just needs a rest. I have wonderful, creative ideas mulling around in my head, but can't seem to organize them or put them down in any sort of order. It is, I know, the consequence of change. 2016 was overflowing with it.
Honestly, I LIKE it. I actually think I breed it somehow. I have this eclectic artistic soul that cannot create without the chaos of it. Change. Going through "it."
Admittedly, though, I like this space I am in right now. I have a part-time job that I LOVE. My coworkers, my bosses, the company, and the town it's in, all are marvelous places to land three days a week. And its part-time, a regular job that suits me and guarantees just enough income to stay afloat. Part-time, real-time employment that gives me time to keep being me. The artist. The gypsy.
I GET to pay rent. Now for some of you who don't understand the pride I experience because of that, please know that for some time I have struggled with getting on my feet, putting shoes on them, and having a place for them to land. Paying rent gives me pride and self-respect. Putting dollars in the pocket of another feels like I'm a blessing, not a burden.
I have a vision. I have long term goals, and short term goals to help me achieve them. I feel fear. The getting started part overwhelms me, and I feel my heart pound and my hands shake every time I take one initial......well, half step. I don't even take a full step! But the vision is real.
This week? The first week of 2017, I took multiple half-steps. But I started. I began. Its a matter of putting one foot in front of the other and just DOING. Am I still scared? Heck yes, I am! Is there the fear of failure? The challenge of not completing it? The facing-off of setbacks? Yes. But I'm going to move forward anyway.
The idea is to START. Just begin. Just DO.
Claiming living is a hard choice to make. I've had financial challenges. Devastating circumstances. Strange and evil things lurking about. Faith-shaking, earth-quaking, life-breaking circumstances that have tried their best to defeat me.
But you know what? They DID NOT. They CANNOT. I'm built for bigger things than that.
There's a really cool quote that I found on Word Porn just as 2016 was coming to an end:
Praise the Lord for that!
I have been through hell, but it was the only way I would look toward Heaven. I can appreciate where I am now because it is so far from where I've been. I discovered I am stronger than I ever knew I was, I have more courage than I thought I could ever muster up, and I am more beautiful because I know my existence is important to humanity. I saw things and people that were in far worse condition than I. I learned what generosity looks like and what love does.
I learned its more than okay to be me. It is required.
Happy New Year, readers. Believe that all things are working together. Believe that you are worthy of the fight. And watch for your inner warrior to emerge. You are equipped with power you might not yet know you possess. And its amazing.
Go get it. Do. Be. Believe.
Have I done a single thing to start this year differently?
It has been a very strange start in 2017, but I can definitely say 2016 ended a whole lot better than it started.
I finally settled into a place to call home. Here I find rich conversation, friendship and purpose. I have a roommate that not only understands me, but lives in a similar mental space. She is by far, one of the most intelligent, beautiful and progressive women I know. She challenges my mind. It it delightful and it is really good to know I am not crazy, or at least not alone if I am. :-)
I've been wondering if I have writers block or if my brain is weary and just needs a rest. I have wonderful, creative ideas mulling around in my head, but can't seem to organize them or put them down in any sort of order. It is, I know, the consequence of change. 2016 was overflowing with it.
Honestly, I LIKE it. I actually think I breed it somehow. I have this eclectic artistic soul that cannot create without the chaos of it. Change. Going through "it."
Admittedly, though, I like this space I am in right now. I have a part-time job that I LOVE. My coworkers, my bosses, the company, and the town it's in, all are marvelous places to land three days a week. And its part-time, a regular job that suits me and guarantees just enough income to stay afloat. Part-time, real-time employment that gives me time to keep being me. The artist. The gypsy.
I GET to pay rent. Now for some of you who don't understand the pride I experience because of that, please know that for some time I have struggled with getting on my feet, putting shoes on them, and having a place for them to land. Paying rent gives me pride and self-respect. Putting dollars in the pocket of another feels like I'm a blessing, not a burden.
I have a vision. I have long term goals, and short term goals to help me achieve them. I feel fear. The getting started part overwhelms me, and I feel my heart pound and my hands shake every time I take one initial......well, half step. I don't even take a full step! But the vision is real.
This week? The first week of 2017, I took multiple half-steps. But I started. I began. Its a matter of putting one foot in front of the other and just DOING. Am I still scared? Heck yes, I am! Is there the fear of failure? The challenge of not completing it? The facing-off of setbacks? Yes. But I'm going to move forward anyway.
The idea is to START. Just begin. Just DO.
Claiming living is a hard choice to make. I've had financial challenges. Devastating circumstances. Strange and evil things lurking about. Faith-shaking, earth-quaking, life-breaking circumstances that have tried their best to defeat me.
But you know what? They DID NOT. They CANNOT. I'm built for bigger things than that.
There's a really cool quote that I found on Word Porn just as 2016 was coming to an end:
Praise the Lord for that!
I have been through hell, but it was the only way I would look toward Heaven. I can appreciate where I am now because it is so far from where I've been. I discovered I am stronger than I ever knew I was, I have more courage than I thought I could ever muster up, and I am more beautiful because I know my existence is important to humanity. I saw things and people that were in far worse condition than I. I learned what generosity looks like and what love does.
I learned its more than okay to be me. It is required.
Happy New Year, readers. Believe that all things are working together. Believe that you are worthy of the fight. And watch for your inner warrior to emerge. You are equipped with power you might not yet know you possess. And its amazing.
Go get it. Do. Be. Believe.
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