QUARANTINED

Feeling weathered and worn.

©CherieElainePhotography2020

There's just nothing like living through it to make a person understand what others are really going through. 

I have succumbed to the dreaded virus. Funny thing, the very night I wrote my last blog was the night the doctor grounded me. Yep, I feel like a kid. Grounded for two weeks. 

My landlords, who live upstairs, are away sheltering in place with family so that they can all take care of each other. I would never want to share this horrible illness with them! They have left me in charge of their beloved chihuahua, Oreo. I would be sad and lost and lonely had I not had her here, and I'm pretty sure she feels the same way. 

©CherieElainePhotography2020

I understand now why people get depressed. This really is awful stuff. 

I was really feeling sorry for myself. Not without good reason though. I can't get warm because I've had a fever since March 24. I can't quit coughing and it has been consistent since March 26. Nothing tastes right and everything smells bad. My body hurts like Hades, like nothing I've quite felt before. I'm not sure when that started because I blamed it all on Lupus for a bit before I realized it was something else. 

I was having severe PPP -- a Personal Pity Party. "I can't go for a drive." "I can't take pictures." "I can't go out and play." "I can't go to the store." Wah, wah, wah! I can't, I can't, I can't. 

But God, our gracious, oh-so-patient and merciful creator, put me in my place. 

     "You can't leave the house, but you can sit on the deck. When you think there is nothing to see because you are stuck at home, it's because you aren't looking."

Oh. My bad. 

When Oreo and I went out this morning, I took a couple of shots of what was in front of me. A bird house. A bike on the porch, weathered and worn, kind of like I am feeling. And then I did a complete portrait session with my little companion. And do you know what? I feel better! 

I'm worn out. I can't wait to nap. But I feel better for the doing.

The lesson is that I was losing sight of the fact that I am still me, still called, and have to choose to live while quarantined. I can't sing right now, but I can play my guitar. I can't hold my grandkids but I can hold this little dog. I can't go away but I can go outside. I can read, color, create, and be still for awhile. 

And really, how lovely is that? 

My thoughts for you are these: That you seek the lovely thing that is right near you, and that you have eyes to find it; that you love the ones you are with, because so many are alone through this; that you don't forget to do, even when it means doing it differently; and that you read, color, create, and be still for awhile and that you love it. 

Love you all so much. 

©CherieElainePhotography2020